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I thought about giving this post a more tame title, but figured it most effectively conveyed the message. Plus, if I am going to go hunting for stupid stuff on Amazon, that is exactly what I would put in the search bar! There are a bunch of lists out there already on this topic, with some classics. This list is (mostly) newer ones.
Some of these things may very well serve a useful purpose, but personally, I find them 100% mock-able. Therefore, I present to you a curated list of things I find weird on Amazon. Some may be the perfect thing for that secret santa or white elephant exchange you have coming up. Many would also be beyond amazing as a way to give cash. Can you imagine getting a Tuna Press for your wedding? Only to discover that there’s actually $200 stuck inside? (Note: If you choose to give a cash gift like this, I strongly recommend writing something in your card. For example, “make sure to open your new Professional Tuna Press, as there is a surprise inside.”)
One of these is not like the others??
Egg Cuber – Make Perfect Square Eggs !
I think this thing is the winner. It is what inspired this post.
Farberware Professional Tuna Press Box, Blue
There’s an unprofessional Tuna Press?
Handy Gourmet JB6107 Fat Magnet
Too bad it only has like 2 stars as a rating.
Full Motion Articulating/ Swiveling/ Tilting Tv Wall Mount Bracket For 40 Inch Sony Internet Tv
1 – Does that image look like a TV mounting bracket to you?
2 – $99,999.00 Seriously?
Clive Christian Imperial Majesty Perfume for Men 16.9 oz Perfume
Smell your best for only $435,000! Don’t worry ladies, there’s a scent available for you as well.
Also, click through and read the reviews, they’re hilarious.
Hurry, your $495 will buy information that’s only good until the end of 2012, don’t miss out!
Presto Salad Shooter Electric Slicer/Shredder
Accoutrements Emergency Underpants
A ThinkGeek.com classic!
Instant Irish Accent Breath Spray
Gnoschitt and Gnofun Pair of Biker Garden Gnomes Statue Motorcycle Leather 32 Inch Figures
Zombie Gnome – Large Gnombie
The following are all things that you use to apply salt and pepper to your food. Have you felt compelled to shake a urinal over your dinner before?
Westland Giftware Coots Magnetic Coot and Toilet Salt and Pepper Shaker Set, 4-1/2-Inch
Westland Giftware Mwah Magnetic Mailman and Dog Salt and Pepper Shaker Set, 3-3/4-Inch
Big Mouth Toys Toilet and Urinal Novelty Salt and Pepper Shaker Set
While you may get more use out of your Clive Christian perfume, this $300,000 painting will last much longer.
1 Adv. Wetlands collar (Size: 19″) (Catalog Category: Dog / Collars – Nylon Collar)
Does your high roller pet just want to blend in? The $9999.99 collar in a wetlands camo pattern will be perfect for them!
Snuggie for Dogs in Pink Small – As Seen on TV
Jovani 7830, Lustrous Camo Hourglass Dress
When you get bored with these, there are many other lists out there, including some classics like a tank. I tried to stick to ones that I hadn’t seen very often (okay, except for the emergency underpants and unicorn meat). There’s also lots of fantastic reviews on these things, I recommend reading the ones on the Clive Christian perfume for a laugh.
Do you know of any funny things on Amazon?
You forgot the Bacon Wallet!
Yes, the Bacon Wallet. It was on a lot of other lists, like the emergency underpants and the unicorn meat (I succumbed with those ones). There are TONNES of crazy bacon things out there though!
Reading this is my study break… so funny hahaha
:-D
The fat magnet. I want it.
…
I can't even imagine what it would be like to get that as a gift. LOL.
OK I won't lie, I've considered buying the zombie gnome…My sister-in-law, God bless her, is a weirdo. She LOVES Halloween, more than most people love Christmas. She also love garden trinkets and I've seriously considered buying it for her lol.
I wanted to get it for the Frugal Portland exchange so badly, but it was over the limit :-( *note to self: should I ever have to get you anything, this is it!
I think that one is hilarious! Do it! Zombies are all the rage these days :-) Had a good conversation about wanting a reason to buy that square egg thingie today on twitter. Vanessa wants to make a pyramid of square eggs.
LMAO! Where do they come up with these things?? The square egg maker is completely useless, yet has a slight neat-o factor to it….
I'm just slightly obsessed with it. I will probably end up with it the next time I need a few more dollars for free shipping, haha.
I love the emergency underpants. It gives a whole new meaning to make sure you have clean underpants in an emergency.
Totally! I can picture them being in someone's office, haha.
Ha ha, I would totally buy the Egg cube, I don't know how can I live without it!
Oval eggs will never be good enough now, I can't believe I've gone this long accepting them.
My husband and I just had a great laugh. Thanks. Gotta get some of those emergency underpants. Never know when you might need them!
Definitely. Every vehicle and office should have some stashed ;-) Glad you enjoyed it!
Wow this is hilarious! I kinda want the cat scratcher DJ…I could totally see my cat going to town on that.
Ya, it looks pretty cool. I think it would be fun to see a cat actually going nuts on it.
This is some hilarious stuff! I gotta say, the cat DJ turntable is pretty funny.
Tell me you bought your boss something off of this list… they'll never see it coming!
Unicorn meat all the way! Although dispensing salt from a toilet shaker would also be pretty novel…
On the registry for a recent wedding was a bird bath, alongside all the things like bowls and salad tongs. We bought it for them, obviously.
Excellent, excellent choice. That's fun! I most definitely picked the toilet paper dispenser thingie once. It was calling my name, I swear!